My Henna Just Belongs To Him

A typical tradition of “Henna Day” one day before the Indian wedding is very common in the USA. Last time, I had henna on my hands with his name in July 2014 which is already shown on this blog. Today, A young girl who is hired by the bride side of the family has painted the henna on everyone’ hands. She has also painted on my hands. She also has painted “Khan” on my left hand. My only cousin has immediately reacted when I told her to paint his name on my hand. Why does she need to react now? Do I care what people think about me? I care what I think or feel? I have given a strange and angry look to my cousin but my daughter just kindly has tapped on my shoulder to calm me down. I listen to my feelings. He is coward but not me. He has betrayed me so why I betray myself. There was no confusion or second thought when the young girl asked whose name I wish to have on my hand.
I share the pictures of my hands with henna with my bloggers and friends. People have given me many names recently such as trooper, bravo, fighter, stupid, uncivilized, and the woman full of courage, passionate, soul lover, arrogant, and rebel. However, what I think of myself? I call myself Sara, the creation of my coward lover. Is this henna should be on my hands or his?

well, his name will continue on my hands until I am alive. One day, at my last ritual, his name will be painted on my hands. Does it matter painting on the hands because God already has painted his name on my soul and heart before my birth, or who knows how many centuries or births it will be permanently painted on my hands, brain, heart, and soul? Nobody could erase the desire of God.

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