Everybody defines God with their own views. For me, God is God and is universal. I was never taught to worship any specific religion. My father taught a triad of H (Honesty, Hard-work, and Humanity) principle of his life to me which I still try to keep it. Yes, I must be God fearing to maintain the principle of my father’s trio of H. Growing up, most of my friends were Hindu but my best friend was a Muslim. I had seen many puddles of blood due to terrorism which did belong to Hindu, Muslim, and Sikhs. Over time, my belief and faith are gone toward Islam. However, nobody has seen me or heard me addressing God by a specific name. I always used to call God by saying, ” My God”. then I have question to myself that God don’t belong to me only so why I am saying, ” My God”.
Past many years, I used to think Ahmed is my God. It was my firm belief or trust that he will never leave me alone, he will always protect me, and he won’t betray me. However, he has broken my trust. He has abandoned me. He has betrayed me. therefore, it makes me thinks who God is and where he lives. Which matter name or worship? People kill each other for the name of religion. Some people don’t hesitate to use religion to play the dirty game of politics. Some people don’t use to hurt somebody’s feelings. What your religion would do if you kill someone emotionally or physically. I never forget a comment when somebody told me, ” Ahmed tera ko halaal ker reha ha”.
I try not to call ” my God” because God is universal, and it belongs to everybody, so God is not my personal God. I am still confused when it comes to religion. God means God. My old boring wise man was right who help me to recognize my confusion. But he had to go so could not help me further which is totally understandable. I know he doesn’t read the blog so okay to praise him. Yes, my old boring wise man is deeply and truly religious who not only belief but also practice. The person must do what he or she says.
I respect all religions, cultures, and caste but humanity is my biggest religion. What religion would do have if you hurt somebody and you left somebody behind hurting? The inner peace will come only when you satisfied. Everybody’s satisfaction is different such as psychological, financial, and societal and there is a long list. Yes, people try to get their satisfaction through God.
Who came first: God, Human or Religion? Why I brought this religion and God topic? Simple, clear, and loud. Someone has brought to my attention that whatever happened in my life possibly due to not having faith in the specific faith. It makes me think that I have faith in God. The Almighty had not told Ahmed to betray or abandoned me. That was Ahmed’s fault. Does Ahmed allow to practice a religion? Allah has not instructed him to harm me. I never saw him praying in my presence. But he goes for Friday prayer. he keeps his Ramadan fasting. I cry every day because he has hurt me so much. God maybe counting my tears So, which principle I should apply here. Who knows who played the politics to break the soul relationship? Whose greed has got the winning prize?
All this situation makes me think, ” who is the God and where he lives”. I have a long list of questions. My first question is, ” well, did you get upset why I used to think Ahmed is my God”. My thoughts stuck again: Trust, Love, and Faith. I used to hear once somebody had God to come through the stone because of his trust, love, and faith. Then why mine was shattered? I have trusted him, loved him, and had faith in him. Oh, but I had chosen honesty over love, trust, and faith so here I am.
To be continued……